So I got an email from Evan today.. (not the Evan that’s often found in the comments of these posts, this Evan:)

Evan’s been working as a music promotor for quite some time..  and is now involved in starting a record label / management company.. He heard my music and was impressed enough to send me an email.. pitching a deal.. which is to say.. that I might sign with him… 

Evan I should add, is married to one of my favorite cousins..

So that was a kind of crazy out of the blue kinda email to get… I don’t have a real strong idea for where Evan and the company he’s in the process of starting is in relationship to.. well anything really.. but it’s probably worth being excited about..

A lot of people think signing a record contract means “you’ve made it.” Slightly more discerning people might think signing a contract with a major label means you’ve made it..  lol, what is perhaps more true is that major record labels is where bands go to die.

Yeah.. so I’ve never been all that interested in trying to get a record deal.. I’ve always figured I’d take a more independent path.. Thus Matt comes to social media…

My adventures through social media have been one where I haven’t really gotten around to executing a social media strategy in a… certain sense. Or.. perhaps I am? Well you’re reading this, aren’t you?

But.. my feeling on this sorta thing has been changing a little.. particularly after seeing this video from Dave Kusek.

Dave Kusek wrote the book “The Future of Music,” which is quite influential on thinking about the future of music.. and here he is suggesting to get in bed with a management company.

Well here’s the thing..

I’ve had a lot of question marks over how to move forwards with building a business around my music.. and I haven’t even been sure that that’s exactly what I should be doing.. I’m a multi media artist after all! 

A long standing thought has been that if I could hook up with someone who did music promotion.. or something like that.. someone who has some experience with this sorta thing.. that it could be a great learning adventure.. and I could probably get a lot further a lot fast, as far as developing a brand. And the thought of a management company.. well.. That sorta thing has been something I’ve been thinking about.

Of course I haven’t really thought of myself as ready for a record label as I don’t feel like I’ve gotten the ball rolling enough.. which is in part complicated by the fact that my music is something created in a studio.. and the way things normally work is you play gigs to promote you’re music.. and that’s hard to do with studio creations.

But.. if Evan things he can make money off me.. and is ready to talk about doing something..  assuming our ideas, and whatever are compatible.. well.. seems like something worth get excited about. 

I have sooooo much crap I haven’t posted… drafts.. I’ve been writing so much, working on so much.. but none of it is seeming right to me.. It’s all seeming terrible to me.. and that’s why I’ve been putting out content so infrequently.. 

It’s all a part of my dark mood.. and it’s hard to know what’s up.. if its that my dark mood infects whatever content I try and produce.. transfiguring it to crap.. or if it’s that my dark mood blocks me from seeing the stuff I produce in a decent light. I have no idea..

Whatever the story is.. I’m not in a mood of being super high on myself.. perhaps latter I’ll be super high on myself in order to compensate for the mood I’ve been in most recently.. I guess we’ll see.

In any event.. allow me to tell you what’s in the pipeline, or being thought about being put in the pipeline.. it maybe that none of this stuff will ever come out.. I may decide that every draft is crap.. every whatever.. and that’ll simply be that.. but allow me to share.

What’s to come, with any luck.

A series of posts.. meditations really, on Aleister Crowly..  I’ve recently been wrestling with him… It will be deeply philosophical.. and in the process I’ll also be wrestling with the culture wars, certain christian groups.. Nietszsche, the sexual revolution.. lots of Jungian psychology.. and lets just say “that Matt schools of philosophy, psychology, and theology.

Posts on planning you’re studio out.. which.. will be from my point of view as I let you in on what I’m thinking about with my studio.. the research I’ve been doing.. gear I’ve been looking at.. all that sorta swell stuff.. also going fairly deep into music production.

I still have a video blog episode I want to put out.. want to finish the production of..  we’ll see what happens on that.

I’ve been working on some music.. I’ll likely tell you about that.

I may start putting out some podcasts again.. perhaps with the main objective of… well just out of feeling to lazy to write really..

I have of few drafts on the subject of me wrestling with my own darkness.. and stuff where this leads into a holistic look at social media, interconnectedness and mental health..  

I may put out some politics stuff.. may start talking about Obama, the recent election… and a few things I think have been going on that no one seems to have really been picking up on.

There’s a number of films I’ve been seeing lately that I might like the comment on..

I’m still thinking about redesigning this website and blog..

There’s probably more, but I haven’t slept for so long that I really just wanna go collapse, so goodnight 

Earlier today, as a part of working on another blog post, I swung over to the old Youtube, checking out various tutorials on various music production tools.. What I was sorta astonished by was.. well, how bad all the tutorials that I happened to bump into.. were. This, of course, would be what we call in the biz “an opportunity.” I could attempt to make tutorials that were actually good.. I mean, just imagine, right?

What sorta tutorials would I make?

One tutorial I checked out was on the Masterworks EQ in Digital Performer.. accept it didn’t really show off very much more then “press this button, turn this knob, it does this,” and there were a number of features to the Masterworks EQ that it didn’t bother to even touch on. So, that got me to thinking what I’d do if I were doing an EQ in Digital Performer type tutorial.. Here’s a basic list.

1. What roll does EQ play in mixing: Coloration, and Frequency Shaping
2. A talk on EQs in general: Why would you use the Masterworks EQ versus other other EQs in DP, what other EQs might you think of adding to you’re studio, and why? Because any tutorials I’d make would be based around what’s going on in my studio.. I’d of course talk about Liquid MIX. But we’d also just basically talk about different types of EQs.
3. Typical EQ Applications and Guide lines: Various instruments.. including the human voice, take place along very particular frequency ranges.. and EQing those instruments in different ways have different effects.. for instance there are certain frequencies, relative to the human voice, which are the frequencies that are important to figuring out what the hell someone is saying.. 

That pretty much covers you’re EQ 101.. and really, that’s a conversation that applies no matter what production environment we are looking at. Indeed I could see.. showing EQs in other apps like Reason, or filters in synths.. 

But one assumes the subject of EQ would probably have to take place over multiple videos.. or once you start talking about filters in synths it does….

I could imagine doing so many videos on so many subjects that I eventually take you up to the level I’m at.. which, I’m starting to realize is.. actually not that bad of a level at all. Normally I feel like my music production skills aren’t really that great.. or I’m always thinking about how much more I have to learn.. how far away I am from the real masters of the Art.. but.. I’m starting to get the picture that.. if you take a look at all the people whom are involved in working in music production.. and learning it.. I’m probably in the upper half… which is a little astonishing to me as.. it doesn’t feel like I’ve really been at it long enough to make such a claim.

This has always been a part of my strategy.. even if I’ve never gotten around to it.. and I suppose its some of the strategy of this blog. See.. growing up I read a lot of guitar magazines.. and in them you’d have little tutorials or whatever.. created by all these guitar heros.. and it was clearly a part something that worked to help the guitarists careers, as the people coming up as guitarists.. well we looked up to those guys, you know? And we evangelized those guys. 

I guess the idea is really.. well my ideal teacher would be someone who shows you the stuff, and gives you some context for it.. and in the process.. you realize that you’re teacher is “A Real Artist” as a pose to someone who fits under the category of “those who can’t teach.” Frankly.. I’ve had very few true artist teachers in my life.. or true in a sense that corresponds to my ideals anyway. So.. I guess we’ll see how well it works..  

So I wanted to share with you some gear I’ve been checking out… brand new, just announced gear… from Native Instruments and Ableton.. the theme here is hardware control of software.. the integration of the two.. which is something I’ve been thinking about a good deal lately. So.. without further a-do…

Native Instruments Maschine 

I’ve been looking into these kinds of.. groove box style controllers for a little while now… What sets Maschine a part from its competition is that it’s an integration of hardware and software.. Usually you get full on hardware.. which is capable of controlling software to a more limited extent.. or you get just a controller, which again is only able to control the software to a limited extent.. here we get the two married together.. 

Generally.. the full on hardware devices a bit more expensive, sometimes a lot more expensive.. and often are somewhat limited with respect to expandability.. where as here.. you have access the the full set of sounds you got going on your computer, basically.. I’ve been seeing Maschine (why must they spell it this way) retailing for around $600. 

There’s a good deal more that Maschine is capable of then this one little video shows.. Native has the rest of there videos on they’re site.. which can give you a fuller appreciation of the devise..  

[editors note, Matt figured this was worth adding, about a day after this was written]>>

I imagine that the economics of a tool like Maschine versus a full on hardware unit are worth mentioning at this point… Most full on hardware units of these types.. well the higher end ones anyways.. the ones that go for a few grand.. are units that try to do everything in one box. This can be economical if you’re not some one with a larger studio..

Like.. take the new Akai MPC 500 sampling work station.. lists for $3500.. this unit has a built in 80 GB hard drive, 2 XLRs, usb, ADAT.. various outs.. blah blah blah.. you’re limited to a 64 track MIDI sequencer, 16 bit 44 kHz audio.. you’ve got limited effects routing.. and the effects are not really all that.. it’s ability to slice up loops is some what iffy..

Now, if you break all this down.. you could get a MacBook Pro for 2K, a Focusrite Pro 4 audio interface for $500.. which has like 8 XLRs in.. all of which actually have phantom power.. and the pres are of way higher quality.. you could pick up a copy of Logic for $500, Maschine for $600..  So for $100 more.. you’re on a whole other planet.. I mean you’re just light years beyond..

I would assume.. if you’re serious about music making.. you must have a decent computer to start with, as well as a DAW like Logic.. and an audio interface.. so at this point things are stacked even further against the full on hardware units.

This is not to say that the full on hardware units don’t have there advantages.. you are, after all, just carrying around one piece of gear.. all the features are made to work together in such a way that.. can sometimes be quite elegant.. but generally these kinds of devices are favored more by “old school peeps” who are intimidated by computers.. and the more complex DAWs.  <<

APC40 for Ableton Live

This is what has me REALLY excited. As near as I can tell from the video.. the integration between the controller and Live is awesome.. which isn’t quite to say that it’s without limitations.. though one would have to play with it to really get a sense of what those limitations look like.. and many of those, I’m sure, evaporate when you add Max for Live to the equation.

Why is Matt Excited about this sort of stuff

I guess I learned a valuable lesson from Kore 2.. when you have hardware control over software, you experience the software in a whole other way… and you can work with the software in a whole new way.. I don’t quite know how to over state this.. 

Ok.. so there’s one.. well actually two.. other things to share.. This is gear I’m actually a whole lot more sold on the above mentioned tools..

Euphonix MC Control

The guy presenting here is a bit more annoying then the fellows in the above videos… don’t you kinda wanna slap him around a little bit? …But if you can look past this.. this is some pretty amazing stuff… 

Euphonix MC Mix

These tools aren’t totally perfect.. they’re probably not worth the investment, from what I’ve heard, if what you’re looking to control is purely Reason or Ableton Live.. as it doesn’t control them so well.. MC Control’s touch screen has a very narrow angle by which you can view it, so you kinda need to be on top of it to use it.. and the screen is known to flicker a bit. There’s apparently a few other sniglets here and there.. but they’ve been doing a good job of updating how these work.. 

That said.. from my point of view its a pretty amazing controller.. and for my studio what I’m thinking of investing in is the Euphonix MC Controller and the Euphonix MC Mix.. which.. and don’t I wish there was some kind of a special bundle deal when you buy them both at once.. run at $2,500 for both.

The price is.. well a lot of money.. but, if you compare it’s features and price versus similar control surfaces.. you really can’t beat them. 

Next day:

I want to continue this bit on talking about using hardware to control software.. particularly as it relates to the Euphonix stuff… or at least how I’m thinking about it.

The first thing is.. when you have touch sensitive motorized sliders.. and in the set up I’m talking about you have 12 of them.. you’re in a situation where you can see what’s going on with your mix automation just from the controller.. as a pose to having to switch on over to your mixer view window in your software..

I think the really big thing here is.. tactile control.. when you mix in the box without these kinds of tools.. you’re controlling the software via a mouse.. via one pointer.. so you can really only move one parameter / one slider.. at once… and you don’t really have the same kind of control over things.

Further, if what you are controlling is effects or a synthesizer program.. you’re in a situation where different parameters interact.. which is a situation where you’d really like to be able to work in a way where you can fully explore that interaction… which is hard to do with a mouse!

The implications are bigger and deeper then this.. but.. I figure that’s probably enough for one post. 

I just got a news letter from Ableton on there new live 8.. links to videos.. and what not.. seems worth talking about.. perhaps in some detail… I’d be sharing the videos with you, accept for some odd reason Ableton decided not to make there videos easily embedable..  so.. you’ll just have to deal with just my yacking about it.

Matt On Live

I haven’t dug real deep into Ableton Live.. of all the sound software in my library, minus new stuff, Live is sorta where I’m the weakest.. and there’s various reasons I would attribute this to.. the two main reasons are as follows:

#1 Live is a very unique sort of sound program.. DAW, which kind of requires you to think about making music in a different way from.. well, what you’re used to. As a part of this.. it’s primary applications seem to pattern based music.. which is not what really my main thing..  

#2 Live is a DAW that’s meant to be played like an instrument.. and so you really want special controllers to get the most out of it. I have one such controller.. from M-Audio.. but the bitched at there tech support do not respond to my problems! ( I hate tech support sometimes )

As a result of these two things… well that and some of the sound library that came with my copy of Live are corrupted.. have caused me to not really work a lot in Live..  and have me feeling like it’s probably the last program I’d likely upgrade.. at least until I start getting more into it. however.. with there being a new Live on the horizon.. it’s worth at least entertaining.

I do still harbor some interest in getting serious about Live.. It’s a very cool application.. with lots of unique creative potential.. and I do feel like my work could hugely benefit from getting serious about it. 

New Stuff on the Horizon

Live 8..

The new Live features a new “groove engine,” a new “warp engine,” a new “looper,” 5 new effects, and some workflow enhancements.. lets take a look at each in a little more detail.

Groove engine 

The new groove engine is actually pretty groovy.. you can take any audio file and it will analyze it’s “groove” and allow you to apply that groove to any bit of audio or midi.. you adjust the percentage by which you want it to effect what you’re applying it to and.. then print it, so to speak.. which permanently groove-if-ies it.

Personally.. Id rather just be able to adjust percentage over time.. perhaps adding various percentages of different grooves to the same bit of audio.. automating the percentages over time.. that’s what would make sense to me but.. apparently not to Ableton? But I still think it looks pretty cool.

The Warp engine.. has to do with tempo matching.. how you match the tempo of one audio file to that of another… say the tempo of the project you’re working on.. basically Ableton have made this a good deal better in there latest version.

Looper 

Looper.. basically.. you have a foot peddle, sold separately of course, that controls Live.. makes it record a loop of what your about to play.. which will then loop.. and over time, you create layers of stuff.. by repeatedly hitting the foot peddle..

It’s kind of cool.. I don’t quite get why you need a whole new feature to do this sorta thing, or whatever.. but it is what it is.

New effects 

The new effects include Vocoder, Multiband dynamics, over drive, limiter, and frequency shifter.. Live has needed a better limiter.. I’ll say that much! The other features are cool to.. and now it really does have a lot as far as distortion features.. relative to what you’d expect to ship with a DAW.. so you know.. it’s something.

Workflow 

The workflow enhancements are.. well.. they basically update this and that..

Matt’s Conclusion

Ableton is.. more religious then any software developer I know.. about putting out new versions yearly.. which.. is a cool thing.. but.. much of the updates seem fairly minor.. I’m not sure of the upgrade price.. and not sure if its totally worth it to me.. particularly given the sorta secondary place we find it taking up in my studio.

Other new stuff on said horizon 

APC40 

The APC40.. this is a special controller codeveloped by Ableton and Akai… I’ll wait for reviews before I get serious about it.. but.. it looks super uber groovy.. kind of the ultimate controller for Live.. Just by sorta watching the video for it, I can see all sorts of wonderful implications. In my view, this kind of a tool could make all the difference.

A theme that is very much on my mind these days is that a significant problem with the software based studio is the absence of hardware interfaces.. particularly good hardware interfaces. The hardware interface is still.. kinda sorta, not what it could be.. generally speaking.. and I would go so far as to say that.. the world of hardware controllers is not likely to… well they probably wont get it right anytime soon.. I give it a good 5 or so years…

How good the APC40 is is.. not clear from Ableton’s presentation.. but that it was codeveloped by Ableton and Akai, specifically to control Live.. gives me a good deal of hope.

The questions marks are mainly.. how much will it cost.. how well does it work with other controllers.. and how well might it work for things other then Live.. like say virtual instruments and effects loaded into Live.. all of which is not entirely clear at this point.

Ableton Suite 8

Ableton Suite 8 is a library of instruments, loops, and samples.. a total of 10 instruments..  It’s retail price is $700.  Umm.. $700 is a pretty substantial investment.. If this library is usable inside of software other then Live.. then it might be worth considering.. but given how much I’ve spent on studio instruments lately.. I’d be hard pressed to shell out that kind of money for the suite.. unless there’s a special price when bundled with the price of the upgrade.

Max for Live

There’s no pricing information available for this one yet.. But.. it’s Max/MSP for Live.. Max is.. a graphical interface development environment, basically.. for digital instruments, effects, and what not… Max for Live sounds like it’s essentially Max streamlined for working with Live…

The issue here is.. I’m already thinking about Max/MSP/Jitter for my studio.. and I’ll be damned if I’ll buy it twice.. so unless they have some kind of a deal for Max users.. I’m not sure it’s worth it for me. 

Share

Ableton is unveiling a new means of collaborating with people over the internet.. which basically makes it easy to share your work.. for collaborative purposes, with other folks.. and you can apparently share stuff with folks on Face Book, MySpace, and embed this stuff on your blog.. people who are not Live users can get a limited time demo of Live to work with your stuff that way.. so its basically like a marketing tool for Live.. 

Some of what Ableton are doing with Share sounds like it ought to be a free service.. but they are apparently looking to charge you for using it.. so the question becomes.. how much.. at what point does it make sense.. and at what point do you look at it as.. another scheme to rid you of money.

Frankly.. sharing large files, like the the project files you use in making music.. is not an easy task via the internet.. so a service that can help with this makes a lot of sense.. but… it’s certainly doable without the service.. and I’m not really sure that the service adds enough value that it would make it make a lot of sense to… well to make it worth being a pay service.. this combined with some of what they are offering feeling like it should be free in the first place.. at least leaves one with some questions marks. 

Conclusions 

I don’t really get the feeling the Ableton really understands it’s marketing issues. What percentage of Live users are just using Live on it’s own.. versus own a regular DAW? I don’t really know the answer to this.. but basically my feeling is.. if you’re serious about electronic music.. Live probably belongs in your tool kit.. along with Reason, and.. probably one traditional DAW.. in my case Digital Performer.. and some people might add ProTools to the list.. 

When viewing Live from this perspective.. I think any extra stuff you’d buy for it.. you really want that stuff to work with other stuff.. If you’re going to shell out $700 from instruments especially for Live.. I think they really need to work in your other DAWs.. If you’re going to spend a lot of money on a hardware controller for Live.. you really are going to wait it to be able to perform double duty with other apps.. and if you’re going pay for a service like share.. well.. you probably want to share more then just projects done with Live.. in fact you probably want a full on collaborate feature set.. of which there are a number of competitors cropping up.. many of which are free..

If Ableton were to get all this right.. they’d be a lot more tempting.. though some of this stuff is quite tempting, I must say. 

My Uncle Cosmo and Aunt Jill were over, as were my mom and dad.. and we were watching movies.. apparently 2 different movies in two different rooms. In one room was Kurrosawa’s Ran, and in another was Sergio Leone’s The Good the Bad and the Ugly.. which somehow seemed like the same movie…

The Good the Bad and the Ugly was made in.. what, like 66? It didn’t come out to America till like.. 1968.. stars Clint Eastwood.. kind of one of the great westerns.. shot in Italy and Spain.. it’s an epic.. with a strange sorta surrealism influence on the look of the film.. Eastwood and Leone made 3 films, back to back, around this period.. of which this was the last.. and I believe the middle one was a knock off of Kurosawa’s Yojibo.. So the influence of Kurosawa is felt deeply.. Indeed some say Kurosawa invented the speghetti western.. The popular Magnificent 7, of course, being a remake of Kurosawa’s Seven Samari.

Of course that’s the difference, right, Akira Kurosawa’s making Samari films and while Sergio Leone is making westerns… 

Now, Ran is the last great epic masterpiece by Kurosawa..  It’s Shakespeare really.. It’s King Lear.. 

There’s a famous scene in Ran.. where this great castle gets burned down.. and of course Kurosawa really burned it down.. though it wasn’t a real castle.. but.. wow.. anyway, for some strange reason I wanted to show my uncle Cosmo where that scene was shot.. which in the dream I was thinking.. somewhere on Cape Cod… or was it down in Boston near where the Pops play out, should they play out?

There was also.. and this is very strange indeed.. a thing in the dream where.. as a defense against the cold, my cat turned into a small hand sized object.. was that what happened? I can’t tell..  can’t remember quite right.. I had been having a thing where I’d try and have the thermostat a little low.. to try and save on the heating bill… so I guess, somehow, that’s what that was about? At least in part?

Towards the end my mom told me to turn the movie down.. I guess everyone was going to bed…

Around this point in the dream I was imagining this music I wanted to make.. along with how I’d record it.. I’d have these kind of.. metal bracelets around my wrists… the kind that would make sound as I shook them… it would be recorded.. I guess using stereo mics.. and I guess I’d be playing an acoustic guitar.. and it was important that my wrist shakes / movements would be recorded in there with it.. and for some reason the wrist shakes I pictured being fed through delay…

 All of this was somehow inspired by Ran’s sound track in the dream.. and then at a certain point, instead of thinking how majestic the music was I started to think “my God that parts cheesy.”

It was at that point that I rolled over in bed.. what I had actually been watching was the commentary track on The Good the Bad and the Ugly… fallen asleep while listening.. I often fall asleep during commentary tracks these days.. and the part I had thought was cheesy was where the film had gone back to the DVD loop.. where it was just that same bit of audio looping over and over again. You know, that part on the DVD before you press play?

Yeah, so strange dream, ha? 

I don’t know what it is about Adobe.. but I’m always feeling like they are screwing me over.. it seems every interaction I have with the company is hell…  so.. well allow me to give you the latest..

But first, a recap:

Sometime ago I went to the Adobe site.. this was somewhere around a year ago.. and bought the Adobe Web Premium upgrade.. from Macromedia Studio 8. Or I thought I had.. Adobe… among other things, is a company that builds web design tools… So you would think a company building web design tools would be able to get there own damn website right, wouldn’t ya? Well, in the past they most certainly have.. At one point I believe web luminary Hillman Curtis designed Adobe’s site.. but things have fallen far from there.

So what was the problem with Adobe’s site?

Well.. good web design ought to be “user centric.” What this means is.. well there’s this whole process. You have you’re marketing data, and out from that data you put together “personas” which are imaginary people whom are examples of you’re target market.. and you say “this is what this person is trying to do” and you use this to try and think about web design from an end users point of view. 

This all relates to usability which is one of the most important things a web designer has to content with.. 

What Matt was trying to do was buy the Web Premium Bundle upgrade.. but it wasn’t clear which bundle this was.. so he ended up, accidently, buying the wrong bundle upgrade.. There was no way to fix the problem via the web site.. so we had to call up Adobe.

Adobe on the Phone 

Well.. what followed was a nightmare.. I don’t remember all the inns and outs of it.. but I do remember that I had to spend a lot of time on the phone.. and I would be switched from person to person.. and I’d have to give them the same information over and over again.. and.. different people would give me different stories about what was to be done. I seem to recall I lost hours on the phone.. and even had to talk to them.. for who knows what reason, on multiple occasions.

The first person said.. I had to buy the new upgrade.. they couldn’t refund the money.. till the wrong bundle package came in the mail.. so I could then return it.. as it had already shipped.. but it hadn’t shipped cause it turned out it was a download only that I had bought.. so I’m waiting around for weeks for that to show up..

Anyway, long story short.. it was a good 6 months before I got my money back.. and I’m not even entirely sure that I did get my money back.. That latter having to do with my dad’s dementia and getting the mail.

Ok, what happened this time?

I’ve been meaning to upgrade After Effects.. but.. I’d also kind of been procrastinating it.. and eventually I decided I’d wait to see what would happen with After Effect CS4. If it turned out that I couldn’t upgrade to it.. as my version was so super old.. I could always just go ahead and buy an upgrade to CS3.. from like Amazon or something.. and I’d be ok with that.

After Effects CS4 didn’t excite me all that much.. but on the Adobe website.. I was still eligible to upgrade.. so what the hell.. I procrastinated more.. and didn’t bother.. 

It really came down to what I was doing in the studio, you understand.. After Effects is a video program.. and for whatever reason Video was taking a back seat to other things.. for like.. most of the first year.

So any who..

I’ve been gearing up to buy it lately.. I hopped on there tonight.. only to discover.. now I can’t upgrade to the current version of After Effects! UHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!! I need this F’N program.. the upgrade costs $300, and the full version is $1000.

So at this point I was harboring secret fantasy’s of a trip in a van.. with high explosives.. to the Adobe headquarters….  but.. deep breath.. mustn’t do that.. they’re not worth it.

So I searched around looking for some place that might still have the old upgrades… and I found one, and bought it.. an upgrade to After Effects CS3. So, no big deal, right?

The Serial Number Problem 

Well.. next comes time to track down the serial number! My friends.. this was from a very very long time ago.. I opened the After Effects box and it wasn’t there! There’s only one place I can think of where it could be.. in a particular box.. but I have no idea where that box might be! So… a searching will have to go on..

But then I thought.. Hmm.. I did register that software with Adobe.. So I screwed around for a while trying to find an ancient email that might get me in.. and I found one.. only one problem… no serial numbers on record!!!!

So I sent customer service an email about it.. I’m supposed to be hearing back inside of the next 24 hours.. so we’ll see what happens with that. In the mean time if that software gets here and I can’t get the serial number… well.. it ain’t going to run…  

So we’ll see what happens, but in the mean time I’m working on a new song to talk about my Adobe woes.. I’m thinking its going to have to be, at least in part, death metal!

I just don’t like the way I get treated by Adobe.. I don’t like this feeling like I’m getting locked out in the cold like this..  It just gets me sooo upset.. and of course my heart was soooo set on this…. and..  given all the problems I’ve had with them.. I really just don’t want to buy Adobe, you know?

So.. if this turns into a giant mess.. maybe I’ll see what’s going on with Apple’s Shake? 

Its feeling late at night… I’m sick… and just got finished watching a movie on the laptop.. had me balling my eyes out thinking about my Mom who died a little more then a year ago. It’s the first time I’ve cried like this since the week of her passing. 

The heart, on this level, is a strange thing. I suppose we all have different ways of relating to our hearts.. I find my self encountering mine, almost as if I were a stranger to it: I don’t know my own pain.

People sometimes tell my they think I’m a good person, or a beautiful person, have a good soul.. all this kind of thing.. but that’s not really how I think of myself, or see myself. Perhaps I’ve eaten the wrong poisons while growing up.. that I sometimes don’t see the good in me.. but as I encounter my heart, I guess I do kinda see it.

I don’t mean, in saying these things, that my heart plays an insignificant roll in my life, or in my choices, or whatever.. it’s probably more a question of how conscious I am of the roll it plays.

A long, long, long time ago.. I had what I equated to be a kind of religious experience.. inside of which I saw, kinda for the first time, a vision of the spiritual dimension of my life. I was struck by how central the spiritual dimension was to my life, which of course said something about the heart.

Of course… in any number of ways I feel like I could be swallowed up by the darkness any old time. I don’t know to what degree that darkness might be a manifestation of imperfections in my spiritual character.. combined with living in such a way so that one doesn’t get too much time away from one’s self.. or something like that.. versus.. say, effects of said poison or.. just the echos of old damage.. or what really.. but I do speculate.

Around here is where the waters grow murky.. The stories we tell our selves about our selves are very often there to server certain psychological purposes.. to the extent to which what we see in the mirror is a reflection of this sorta thing, what can you say? And when you feel you’re self compelled by those psychological needs.. to tell those stories to your self.. what do we make of them?

In the west, spiritual stuff tends to have an emphasis on the ethical.. that doesn’t like nature in the same way that you might find in the east.. where to be natural is a very good thing indeed.. it might sound counter eastern to say this.. but being possessed by these psychological needs.. does seem rather natural. 

I think of my various personal mythologies.. I wrestle with them.. I feel as if there is a degree to which.. well like there’s a gap between them and reality.. or why should I cling to them so strongly? To what extent are they to serve as an antidote to the poisons, versus are they some kind of self dilution to help rationalize a kind of inertia? The process of discriminating between these things would seem to be quite the challenge… and one way or another this is the central challenge of my life at this moment.

One way of approaching these things is to look a the various mythologies genesis points.. tracing there histories forward.. and sorta looking at the context they live in. 

There is a horrid pain.. so painful that.. well that I’m not even really aware of its full depths.. but, the further back in my history I go, the deeper into the pain I go.. 

So… mythologies during the excruciating periods.. where what were holding me together. Theye are, in some senses, a compensation for a massive inferiority complex… 

I used to feel real afraid to think of myself as very smart.. as if this were somehow arrogant.. I still feel a little this way but.. I can acknowledge my strengths better now, I think? Well I think it felt like something worse then arrogant.. or.. like there was just something very wrong with thinking of myself as too smart.. and of course it didn’t help that I didn’t know if thinking of myself as too smart.. to what extent that was like a compensation.. just as I don’t know now.

In certain secret places within myself.. my estimation of myself is very high indeed… high enough that I don’t really trust these estimates. How could I?  

Err.. I’m not really having the balls to tell you how high these estimates are.. but just trust me when I tell you that they are so high that I don’t know how to believe them. It’s perhaps interesting to note, if we take all of this stuff on the level of personal mythology, and treat this reflection as an exercise done in the name at getting at something.. someday.. that trying to drive in this direction might one day yield a revelation worthy of the journey… that I don’t actually have any secret fears. Private fears sure, but not fears tucked away from myself.

It maybe that these secret estimates are on the money. I am at least suspicious that they could be… and I suppose the course I’m trying to travel is one to attempt to honer them.. even if I can’t bring myself to fully embrace them.

I was reflecting, recently, about my post college years.. an in particular this long period I’ve gone without a job. Seems that whenever there’s a family get together someone expresses concern about me finding employment.. and the impending disaster over my economic future… and very often this serves to reinforce all my worst fears… all be them none secret.. lol…

But I think there’s a story here worth looking into… though perhaps we need to go further back then college.

Growing up, of course, I was put in special ed classes. I don’t think I actually needed the special ed classes, I don’t think they helped a thing.. accept to give me an inferiority complex. I think the only reason I was in those classes was because I wasn’t at all engaged in school.. When I was 7, they gave me tests… looking for learning disabilities.. and discovered that I was function at the average level you’d expect from one entering high school..  which I suppose is most remarkable considering, at that point, I did everything I could to avoid doing any sorta work in school…

Anyway.. so there was some strange courses my life took as a result of this.. some strange relationship to authority.. the way I felt screwed over by the school system.. never really connected to my teachers.. that lead me to feeling like.. after college.. I had to strike out on my own.. go on my own personal adventure.. which is what I have been doing.. and which also happens to be what this blog more or less chronicles.

Now, how does this relate to not having a job all this time? Well a part of it is this need to go on the adventure being more powerful then the need for a job.. But also feeling like.. in all those years.. whoever saw my potential? No one..  So why would an employer?

It is funny that.. my last job was doing contract work.. basically as a designer.. and I had the distinct impression that my boss, the art director, and everyone else in that office, thought I was destined to be a superstar. 

How about a song break?

How about that Yoko Knitting? 

When I sit down and try and do new media design work.. last time was around a year ago.. I feel like “oh yeah, I probably could be a superstar at this.”

Latter that night: 

Messages from the unconscious  

It’s funny to me, what a dark moment this feels like to me.. this moment of my life, and yet how hopeful this post feels to me. The truth is that I do have a lot of hope.. The trouble is.. wondering how rational it is.

The unconscious mind always play a compensatory roll.. in relationship to conscious attitudes.. so as our attitudes shift day by day.. so does the unconscious’s expression. I am fortunate in that I view the unconscious as a helper.. where for others its a more dark and scary place. These days I find.. if I wonder too far off into the darkness.. the unconscious seems to do something so that a bright light will flash up out of no where… this could happen on the level of something going on in my mind.. or it could come at me from the outer world.. as it actually often does.. via social media. Strange indeed!

And so it seems that this whole blog post.. it’s self a kind of steaming consciousness.. triggered by tears for my mother, seems such an expression.

Social Media and the Unconscious

I have a draft of a blog post that may go into this subject a little bit but.. this strange relationship I seem to have with.. well social media.. and the unconscious is.. strangely enough, a part of my social media strategy.

Next day sometime:

Well… it’s time for be to blog on another subject.. so I’ll just post this monstrosity..  but I’ll end on a song that seemed to sorta some up my feelings yesterday:

So you’ll know doubt recall, if you’ve been following me for any length of time.. and closely enough to notice this sorta thing or remember it.. lol.. that I’ve been kind of excited about the possibilities of vocal synthesis. Vocal synthesis is a technology via which we use special kinds of synthesizers to… well sing. This is,  I think, an interesting subject.. if only from an academic perspective.. but for me it takes on special importance because.. I can’t really sing.. and it, at least potentially, could be the best way to bring lyrics to my music… or at least one key to it.

Generally.. for music to be popular, it needs vocals..  I’m not really aiming to be a pop sound artist.. but.. as kind of avant guard and experimental as many of my musical inclinations might be.. the music I make is not like.. an unapproachable high brow thing… it is a product of a certain type of aesthetic thinking.. it is a kind of searching, a kind of adventure.. and exploration. I love the feeling like.. I’m doing something original.. developing a unique voice… I’m.. even if it’s only on a compositional kind of level.. or on a kind of.. purely aesthetic level.. talking about certain things.. its a kind of sonic philosophical discourse.. it’s often described as “conceptual music.” All of this doesn’t make it unapproachable unless the soul metric of approachability is that it sounds like everything  you’ve already heard in your life..

On the subject of lyrics 

The possibilities of lyrics is.. both exciting and  terrifying for me. Without lyrics the music seems like it’s open to infinite interpretation.. and lyrics seem to.. suggest “and this is what this piece of music is about,” the implication being that it potentially limits interpretations..  Further.. can I even be a great lyricist? I mean.. as I strike out trying to do this, will it somehow work against what is good in my work?

I have, as it turns out, been writing lyrics since I was at least in the 8th grade… They have never really been anything I’ve been overly proud of.. never sure if they suck.. but occasionally I show them to people.. and some people really like them.. so what the hell, right?

My lyrics start out in a spirit that is very much coming from the same place as my music.. a kind of anarchical relationship to structure.. which is where the searching starts.. lets throw out notions of right and wrong, and build a new world with new values.. new ideas of right and wrong.. on the aesthetic level here of course.

My lyrics tend to be about a kind of cosmic searching.. a search for enlightenment.. It’s as if the writer has a certain persona.. and that persona can be both super smart, and super monstrous.. at best there can be a kind of mind bending quality to it that challenges, at least for the moment, you’re perception of the.. well just how you think about things… and it does this in a way that feels dangerous.

sometime the next day:

I’ve been writing all this crap and not posting it, so hopefully I can just get through this one fast.. already I’m not quite sure of the flow.. but what the hell, lets finish this puppy…

Cantor first impressions

I downloaded the Cantor demo sometime ago.. and wasn’t supper happy with it.. but it is pretty close to the only game in town.. at least on the Mac.. But the demo, as it turns out, is a version behind the real version.. so it was time to check out the current version.

The first challenge is learning how to use it. VirSyn’s ideas about interface design are a little.. well both dated and idiosyncratic..  and it doesn’t help that vocal synthesis is kind of a big jump away from how traditional synthesizers work…

You have this interface, and you draw in notes.. and on the notes you tell it what word you want that note to be… from here we can adjust various parameters of the note to create a vocal performance…

The first thing you start dealing with are phenomes.. which are component sounds of our language.. you type the word, it has a big old dictionary from which it finds the word.. and the component phenomes.. and you can adjust the phenome spacing in the note. There’s more to it then this, but this is the basics of it.

The first mega huge problem you run into is the interface.. which proves to be a little bit of a pain in your butt… as far as how to get working.. and even once you have it worked out.. it’s rather clumsy.. as a for instance.. hitting command Z for undo.. very frequently doesn’t undo what you just did in Cantor, but undoes the “why yes, I’d like to add Cantor to my project in my DAW” command.. resulting in the loss of hours of work.. and then some of the features don’t even seem to quite work.. but then.. I’m just a learner, so who knows.

After some time mucking around with it I did find a workflow that made sense.. It’s one of these programs where you have to learn to work around it’s limitations.. which.. sucks.. but.. the results were exciting.

How Cantor differs from it’s competition.

On the PC side of things there’s.. I wanna say its made by Yamaha… a similar instrument.. but the difference there is that the phenomes are not synthesized, they’re sampled… The result is that you can actually get fairly realistic realizations of singers.. where as with Cantor.. there’s no hiding the fact that its synthesized.

The choice, at least if you’re on a PC, between going with a sample based or synthesis based.. singing instrument.. is probably an aesthetic / what sort of applications do you want to explore with it sorta thing: There are lots of places where robot type voices sound pretty cool, after all… which might be particularly true for someone like myself.. who does mostly electronic music anyway. 

Some other options I’ve considered:

One option is to attempt to sing… and use a program like melodyne to fix my wrong notes. Here the problems are a couple fold:

1. It “may be” that hitting the wrong notes is not all that’s wrong with my singing. There’s software out there, of a not unsubstantial cost, that one can use to fix these problems as well… but of course thats more money and more work.
2. The kind of gear needed to record really good vocals isn’t cheap, and I haven’t really invested in it.
3. The work flow would involve.. write the song, practice the song, record the song, edit the badness.. which ends up taking quite a lot of time and energy.. so that… even given the problems we find with Cantor.. it actually has a much better workflow for.. kinda how I’m doing things now.

Another option is Vocoding 

I don’t think I’ve really played with Vocoding too much.. the VirSyn effects bundle I recently invested in includes a Vocoder.. One that got a really good review in a recent issues of Sound on Sound just recently.. so I’m ready to try it out… 

Basically.. you have two signals.. signal one we look at and analyze… what is the amplitude of what frequency? You have a kind of grid of so many frequencies.. on the second signal.. we apply EQ… that imprints on the second signal.. what happened on the first.. if this frequency is this loud on the first, turn the EQ that far up on the second.. for that part in our grid. 

So this is how vocoding works… and the results tend to be.. “and now we have a funky talking robot.” There’s more applications for vocoding then this.. but this would seem to be the main one. 

latter: 

There’s probably more to say, but I must post… 

[editors note: This post was started yesterday.. and Matt is actually feeling a bit better today] 

I’m feeling so sick, or have been, that rolling over has been difficult.. and now I have to venture forth to get some food.. some liquids, and what not.. to help me kinda survive… what a mess I am..

In other news I just got through watching the latest Apple Keynote at MacWorld.. which always seems like a worth while topic to blog on..  This year’s MacWorld Keynote was… a strange one as it is apparently the last one.. from now on Apple will be presenting there new stuff on there own..  not at MacWorld, which gives them the advantage of not having to always have something to show off at that particular time of year.. so they now have more flexibility.. which might be a good thing.. but.. it strikes me as the end of something that was an very important element of the Apple experience.. for those of us rabid Mac people..

The other interesting point of this keynote is it was not presented by Steve Jobs.. For a long time now.. there’s been a lot of speculation about Steve’s health.. and issues of succession plans.. People feel like “what would Apple be without Steve?” On rummers of Steve’s declining health.. Apple’s stock price plummets.. and so I suppose not having Steve do the keynote.. was in part a way of saying.. Apple has a lot of good people.. and to start lessoning the feeling that Steve Jobs is Apple.

Still.. Steve Jobs is perhaps one of the worlds best presenters.. he’s legendary.. and without Steve giving the presentation.. Apple’s reality distortion field.. isn’t what it otherwise would be.. which I suppose is fine with me.. but.. I also suppose this will be reflected in my comments.

Apple’s new announcements were of updates of there iLife and iWork suits.. as well as a new 17″ MacBook Pro.

iLife 

iLife.. of course, is basically a set of media production tools for the none professional.. They come free with new Macs and are under $100 if bought on there own..  What they allow you do to, without spending a lot of money, and without burdening you with all kinds of crazy technical stuff to have to wrap your brain around, has always been pretty astonishing..

The problem, however.. is that for me, iLife is sorta… “well why would I use that stuff?” I’m someone trying to operate on the pro level… so instead of using iMovie I use Final Cut Studio.. and hopefully After Effects soon.. instead of using Garage Band I use Digital Performer and a whole lot of other groovy stuff… instead of using iPhoto I use Aperture…

So a part of me feels like.. well that I want Apple to give me reasons to care about iLife.. which pretty comes down to “give me some sort of unique tools,” which of course it doesn’t really do.. 

As a social media person.. I love encouraging people to explore the new landscape.. and iLife is a great set of tools to do that.. of the “any one can make media” type of thing. The trouble is.. if you are a serious social media person.. some of the iLife tools aren’t quite right… and I feel as if.. what Apple ought to do.. is make them quite right for this kind of application.. and so this is my other disappointments. 

New Features

iPhoto now uses facial recognition tools.. along with geo tag stuff.. to help organize photos.. It’s some pretty cool stuff.. but… it’s so consumer orientated… that I’m like “yeah, ok.”

GarageBand now lets you down load tutorials to learn how to play guitar and keyboard. This was a big yawner to me.. not to mention that all the tutorials seemed pretty well orientated towards total beginners… which I actually am when it comes to keyboards… but I’d rather not learn the “simplified version of the song.”

iMovie’s feature set’s depths are now a little more… flushed out.. which is good.

iWork

I’m not totally sure how I feel about iWork.. and so won’t say too much about it.. however, I am thinking of buying a copy as it does feature there keynote program.. which is really good for giving presentations.. and I’d really like to make some sorta presentation on Podcamp this year.

New 17″ MacBook Pro 

The long and the short of it is Apple’s saying the new 17″ MacBook Pro features up to 8 hours of battery life.. and they will last up to 1000 recharges.. which works out to about 5 years.. Of course Apple’s estimates of battery life are notoriously untrue.. so who knows..  but one still imagines it will be pretty groovy…  

Removing the battery pretty much takes a technician.. so.. that’s kind of an issue, though Apple says by not allowing you to remove the battery they can save space and make a better battery.. so, I guess its a trade off.. and if it does last 5 years.. the battery issue isn’t so bad.

Other interesting points is that it comes, by default, with 4GB of RAM, it’s processors are.. I wanna say 2.9 GHz… of its fastest processor option is.. though they do make you really pay for it..  making it a faster processor then what we find in my Mac Pro.. and finally we have option for both glossy and flat screens.

A few other things to note.

In working out how fast a computer is, it doesn’t all come down to speed of processors.. there’s many components to our computers, and it depends on all those components mixed with how the software we are using uses those components.. And.. the RAM speed of the new Mac Book Pros is now 1066 Mhz… SO-DIMM…  DDR3… which is very fast… So RAM intensive apps out to run extra groovy.

Another fun note is that Apple was sued.. not all that long ago… by photographers.. who were doing color critical work.. when Apple had said there laptop monitors gave you millions of colors when they did not… Now Apple is claiming there monitors have “a greater color range” so.. I suspect this is sorta an answer that bit of PR…  

Personally

If my studio didn’t mainly center around a Mac Pro.. if I had to be on a laptop.. the 17″ MacBook Pro is the one I’d go with… and there is a part of me that wishes I had gone with a MacBook Pro instead of a MacBook… for the simple reason of Firewire.. and the sorts of things I’d like to do with it.. but…  I also feel like.. given the kinds of things I’m trying to do with my Computers.. even the 17″ Mac Pro.. doesn’t quite have enough power… ( High end 3D graphics )

Why You’d want a 17″ MacBook Pro:

More screen space equals more productivity… this is made particularly true when it comes to pro apps that generally have a tun of pallets and what not.. that can take up much space. Further.. God forbid you ever do something like music production where.. on many a software’s box it list “2 monitors” under preferred system specs. Of course you can attach that second monitor to your MacBook while in your home office type situation…

Matt’s top Apps for Duel Monitors:

1. Flash: Having a timeline take up one monitor, and the stage another.. rocks.. 
2. Digital Performer: Having MIDI Editors and mixing windows on different monitors… or if you find your self messing with automation of an effect or synths parameters.. duel monitors is just the way to go
3. Final Cut Studio: Having your stage views on one monitor and time line / sequence bin on the other.. makes me happy when I’m feeling blue
4. After Effects: Again.. timeline on one monitor, stage view of other.

There are apps that don’t seem to benefit from duel monitors.. Ableton Live is one of the first that comes to mind.. however.. should yo want to use Live in ReWire Mode.. which means its audio is being routed into another program, or another program’s audio is being routed into it.. having the two programs on two different monitors is always a nice thing… 

And if all that weren’t enough.. 

For us social media folks.. don’t we always want to have twitter up somewhere? Or how about our email program? A browser? Well that’s how I like to roll.. it’s sorta like having little conversations in the office while working…  

Notes on Matt’s Studio 

I bought my Mac Pro a year ago.. and I went with a Mac Pro.. not because it was so bad ass.. but because it had just been updated.. and I like to have the longest product life cycle possible before the new version comes out.. it’s kinda a get the most value idea.. I had actually wanted a 17″ MacBook Pro..

So of course I had to take advantage of what a Mac Pro has to offer.. which is why I decided to enter the wonderful world of 3D graphics.. I started out with 1 24″ HD display

But of course had to move on to a second 24 HD display.. of course you’ll take special note of how neat I am as a person..

I’m not even sure what was supposed to be in focus in that shot!

Back to why the 17″ MacBook Pro

Power 

Well.. the 17″ is the most powerful of the MacBook Pros.. and if you’re like me power means a lot.. My sense is that most people don’t really need a Mac Pro.. but on the level of the MacBook Pro.. well.. the benefits are probably more apparent right off the bat.. 

If you’re doing video, effects often have to render.. doing sound.. how many effects / instruments instances can you handle? More sophisticated instruments and effects often require more power.. If you’re just surfing the web.. power probably isn’t all that important..

Most modern computer.. are actually pretty powerful, even the budget ones..  so I think it’s more then reasonable to ask if paying close to $3000 for a computer is necessary.. Hell.. you could get a couple mid ranged computers for that! Further.. if you’re apps that need the power the most… can take advantage of a network of computers.. perhaps getting a couple mid range computers is actually the smarter way to go! Of course.. if you’re computing on the go, what good is that going to do you?

Matt’s Philosophy concerning this sorta thing:

For me.. I wanted a mobile studio option.. that’s why I got a laptop.. I got a MacBook.. and a mid range MacBook at that.. which is to say one that doesn’t really have that much power…  It has enough power to do whatever I’d want to do with it.. well.. mostly.. but perhaps not do it as well as might be ideal.. and seeing as it only has a 13″ screen.. the productivity isn’t really that great… but.. being a 13 inch-er does make it more portable.. and on a price versus performance level.. it maybe the sweet spot in the Mac laptop range.

Having the mobile studio… in conjunction with the home studio..  means anything I do while out and about.. can be brought home for more serious heavy lifting work.

Top Jobs for which a Laptop is the way to go (at least in the land of Matt)

1. Working with clients: Lets say I’m doing your web design.. being able to go hang out with my client at a Starbucks and show you the work I’m doing for you on the laptop.. well, that’s really the way to go.. and this is probably more or less true for any sorta work I might do for a client.
2. New Media stuff: I can go anywhere… shoot some video, do some audio work.. take some pictures and whatever.. and put it together on the go.. 
3. Recording: Not having firewire is an issue but.. I could go to any environment and record.. where the band is, or where there might be an interesting acoustic space.
4. I could be a live sound engineer: I could probably invest in a few more plugs but.. I can have all the audio ins from the band coming into the laptop.. have them recorded.. and mix them live.. adjust EQ live.. and all the rest of it.. and give the band the live mix..
5. I can play out: I play guitar.. and um, can at least press down the keys of a keyboard. On my computer are all my effects, and what not.. for my guitar playing… plus all my digital instruments.
6. I could DJ: DJ-ing is, apparently, a big part of electronic music culture. The music I normally make is a studio construction.. not really something I can do live.. but.. playing live is an important part of how the music industry works.. that’s how you promote you’re stuff.. so developing a live act.. where DJ-ing plays a roll.. could make a fair bit of sense.
7. Make art from nature: Artist who do a lot with sketchbooks are often drawing from nature.. but digital artists are usually stuck in the studio.. and the closest we get to working from nature is often working from photographs..  So this is sorta a big deal.
8. Get the vibe of the situation: When you’re out and about.. doing whatever.. there’s often a vibe, and energy.. and being able to work with that vibe and energy.. having that effect you’re creative flow.. is a very cool thing indeed.

 Ok.. so this post has probably gone on for too long.. so time to post!